I had planned on sharing photos, of our recent trip to the United States, in chronological order. But as I was biking home from work today, I was struck very strongly with the urge to share our experience making a flower crown with Kaity Ferrell while we were in Nantucket, which happened closer to the end our trip. I hadn’t planned on writing a post about making a flower crown, since it was a spontaneous activity, but it was such a lovely, mindful learning experience that I wanted to give it it’s own space on the blog.

Now, first off, for those of you who don’t know me very well, I do not let my children pick flowers, pluck leaves from trees, tear at grass, or in anyway take the lives of plants needlessly or for aesthetic reasons. This is not because I have any special knowledge of what a plant death is like, but out of an interest in living consistently and holistically, as much as possible. We do not eat animals or animal products, and limit the inclusion of animal fibers in our wardrobe, including them only when they are the more environmentally friendly option. We do this because we don’t think it is our human right to take life. Animal life or plant life. Having said this, we know that, however mindfully and carefully we tread upon this earth, we do take lives. We eat plants plentifully to nourish ourselves. And we certainly indavertently and accidentally take the lives of countless animals, mainly insects, as we go about our lives. However, when we had children we decided that we wanted to be as consistent as possible with our children in terms of the belief that taking a life is not a given right, a life should not be taken lightly, and a life should never ever be something we take “just because we can,” because we are a dominant species. Picking a flower is easy to do, a young child can do it with little effort. If and when our children do take lives we want them to be mindful about it and always limit it as much as possible. Enough of a diversion into our flower politics…on to making a crown.

When we arrived on the island of Nantucket our first host, the absolutely divine, Kaity Ferrell, along with her son Iley, greeted us at the port. Their big smiles and sweet souls wrapped hugs around us as though we’d been friends forever. It was a beautiful welcome. Kaity took us to a favourite beach and then after some time in the sun and a dip in the ocean we returned to her beautiful, simple homestead.

I am not someone who plans their day, even while on travel. I really like to be spontaneous and go with the flow of where things take me. So, of course, upon arriving at Kaity’s we had no particular idea of how we would occupy our time. While Sen and Iley set to playing with Lego, Ro and I were curious to see Kaity’s garden, where she grows fruits, vegetables, flowers and herbs. Given that Kaity’s garden is source of ingredients for her foods and the goods she sells, we were surprised by how much space was afforded to growing flowers. I asked Kaity what she used them for and if she sold them at the farmers market. She replied “I sell some, not many, but they are just beautiful to have around, right?” Yes! I felt a little silly for assuming that she would necessarily pick or cut them for her products and goods.

As Ro and I admired a bouquet of flowers, that was now a few days old, sitting on Kaity’s dining table, Kaity suggested that we make a flower crown. Not surprisingly, we have never made one, since we would never happen to find and collect enough fallen flowers (with stems intact) on a given day to make one. In that moment, I instantly felt as though this was the right time and place to make a flower crown. Kaity’s reverence and connection to her garden and the lives she grows there assured me that if ever there was a time and place for respectful, mindful picking, it would be done here, with Kaity as our guide. My intuition also told me this experience would deepen Ro’s respect for plant life and wouldn’t lead to a slippery slope of picking flowers for aesthetic purposes.

Ro and I followed Kaity around her garden as she gently cut a few flowers, naming them as she did and talking about her experience growing them. Once she had a small bouquet cut, she sat with Ro and started to braid the flowers, explaining to Ro how to continue the braid and how to handle the flowers with care. Ro took the flower braid and continued until all the flowers had been used. Then Kaity looped the braid back on itself and tied it securely with some kitchen string. The braid was the exact right length for Ro’s head, with no wasted flowers. It was as if it was meant to be! But I also knew there was some sort of deep embodied knowledge in Kaity that allowed her to know exactly how many flowers to cut, and how the braid would come together.

Overall the experience of making a crown with Kaity was wonderful. While on an intellectual level, I have to admit that cutting flowers was a conflicted experience for me. On a bodily level I feel at peace with the experience. Ro wore the crown for the rest of the day and evening, and Sen, without any prompting asked to wear it too! We saved the crown during the rest of our travels gingerly protecting it in our picnic basket, and it will, in its dried form, hang on the wall in Ro’s room (see it here), as a reminder of our experience with Kaity, but also as a reminder to live mindfully and with respect for all life.

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Thank you very much, Kaity, for hosting us in Nantucket and for sharing your positive energy and kindness with us. Readers: you can read more about Kaity in my interview with her here and please find her on Instagram @fareisle and on her awesome website www.fareisle.com and her blog here.

Clothing details: Canadian-made merino tops worn by Ro and Sen by Luv Mother; Ro’s plaid tunic by Kids on the Moon; Ro’s dijon skirt from Little Heirloom; Sen’s organic striped leggings by Mabo; Ro’s sandals from Mini Mioche.

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